Friday, July 30, 2010
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Sunday, July 25, 2010
The yard sale came and went (by "yard sale" I mean cupcake, lemonade, parking lot strewn with goodies, and old furniture sale). Two days Shola and I patiently broiled in the sun in order to make ends meat (and by "patiently" I mean screamed at people who passed by, first "cupcakes, lemonade" and second profanities.) On Saturday morning I told a half awake Alex "I'm going make the means to pay for our wedding." After it's over and done with (celebratory cocktail money subtracted) it looks like we will be having a forty dollar wedding (Alex, you can thank me later).
The highlight, was when a man named Steve who also went by the nickname Moose showed up at our yard sale. Moose: tan, toothless, loud, laughing, came over muttering how "he wished he was drunk (mind you this was 8:30am)." Moose traded us a 7 person tent for a cup of lemonade. When Moose took a sip, he poured the cup right out. He was a polite man, completed each sentence with a "thank you mam' ." Moose explained how he sometimes slept in the bushes across the street from Shola's house. Moose, who was originally from Texas (the same town as George and Laura Bush) explained that usually he spends his time working on an oil rig in Texas, but decided to take the year off to be homeless in Portland, Oregon (which makes total sense). When I asked Moose how he will ever get back to Texas, he responded with "Well I'll just call aunt Dot. Her real name is Dorthy, but we call her Dot, and she has money to send me home." After the third stop by our sale (not to mention countless wisdom about which Plaid Pantry workers were "cool", and "real fucking assholes"), Moose decided it was time to take his tent back "he needed it to sleep in" (fair excuse I guess).
Thank you to everyone who stopped by. For those of you who couldn't make it, you'll have a second chance for lemonade and baked goods! We've decided to have a regular lemonade and cupcake stand. Keep your specs peeled.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Thursday, July 22, 2010
It was a five dollar special, remember? We walked right up to the window and ordered one five dollar bucket of donuts, please. Just like that! That was the night the man (without a single tooth to boot) reached his hand out and whispered I'll take the chocolate. He had a voice like a gravel road... and he accidentally touched ever donut in the bucket.Oops! Sir, you're scaring us! The logical solution (if you recall) was to toss the bucket's contents from the tip top of the Odine building. When the coast was clear they fell to the ground, all twenty plus donuts (minus the chocolate of course). It was the best combination of donut and pavement I ever heard in my life.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Blog Special of the day: sign up for my blog, and win a prize! That's right, a prize. Would you believe there are three people that are on my list of prizes? Guess what you three get? That's right, you guessed it (just in case you didn't get it from the picture... keep your specs peeled for a pie right to the kisser).
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Sunday, July 18, 2010
If you were my friend, and you loved to cook... would you come over to my house and make me breakfast in bed? Thank you. I would like to have bacon, scrambled eggs, sourdough toast (not to mention a small side of raspberry jam), a cup of coffee with cream (not to mention one lump of sugar), a glass of water, all served on my green tray,with matching dishes! You don't mind, do you?
Friday, July 16, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Come on barista, did you really have to give me sass when I order the continental ?Please note the following interaction takes place after I attempted to order food from the "all day menu." To my surprise the Barista said NO, we stopped serving that at 3pm. You call yourself an ALL DAY MENU, Please (pronounced "pa- leeze"). So anyways, I say, May I get one continental please? And then she says, you know what she says to me? She says, Umm... ("..." represents long pause), I guess I could make that (like it was a difficult thing for her to do). I'll have you know that the continental consists of a piece of baguette with butter and jam on the side...that's right, bread, jam, and butter... not even a chop involved... yeesh.