Friday, November 20, 2009

Worst Date Ever

It was the worst date I ever had. The red batman symbol sticker on the middle of the rear window of the red 99' honda civic, should have been a sole indicator. "Turn away (sounds like "tuuurrrn aawwwwaaaay" in a deep voice)... "don't go there" (kind of like warning spooky voices in a haunted house). I was 18, in a new city, a new apartment, I was desperate for human contact besides my family (don't get me wrong, I love my family).  In the car ride, we talked about the sports we played in high school (boring). At times our voices were masked by the bad latest rap song.
"I ran cross country" I'd say
"WHAT?" He'd say.
"DROP IT LIKE IT'S HOT DDDRRR RR OP IT LIKE IT'S HOT" said the radio.

I know, that should have been my que to plead "the bathroom" and start running the opposite way of the car. That didn't happen. I just kept on riding in that car, the one with the Batman sticker, towards...wait wait wait wait, "are we going to Beaverton?" 

We show up at THE OLD SPAGHETTI FACTORY... in Beaverton, in the Batman car, with the sports conversations ( I know I know, I sound like an asshole, but seriously, would you be happy?) Blah blah blah, skip to the parts where I'm ordering a drink appealing to a minor, like a strawberry lemonade. Just when I thought that maybe I was being unfair, my drink is placed in front of me. (QUE the condiments)... ok go! In come salt, pepper, parmesan cheese, sugar, the date... my date is actually putting these things into MY drink. 

"What the hell are you doing?" I ask in a "What the hell are you doing" type tone.
"I dare you to drink that" He says (as if he was being cute, and flirty). 
"Dare me to drink that? I'm not going to dr..." I start to say.
"FINE, I wi.." Mid way through the word "will" he is drinking my lemonade, condiments and all. It pretty much went on like that, bad... really awkward, all the way to the very last bad rap song home. 



 

No comments:

Post a Comment